Snot, Poop, and Pee, Oh Goodie for Me!

Ever have one of those days where you seem to deal with all kinds of gross things all at once?  Yeah?  That was how our walk during the brief period it wasn’t raining here went today…

It’s been raining almost every day now for a week or so, or maybe that’s just how it seems to someone with two small kids that want to play outside… Anyway, it stopped briefly after lunch and I decided we’d put on our boots and go look for some worms; after all, little kids love bugs.  Out we went, and quickly found a couple big night crawlers in the driveway.  That entertained them for a few minutes and then my daughter asked if they could splash in puddles.  Hey, why not?  We might as well make the best of our short time outside, so I agreed.

We started walking around the back yard, avoiding the piles of dog poop, and finding some good puddles to splash in.  It was Monkey’s first time to really get to splash in puddles, and he and Peanut were having a lot of fun sloshing around with their matching green froggie boots.  They were having so much fun that we started walking all the way to my in-law’s pond.  I figured they could look at the rocks there, splash around a little more and we’d head home in time for Monkey’s nap.

We were on the path when I noticed Monkey’s nose had a bunch of thick snot just hanging from it, dripping over his lips.  Yuck!  Of course I had slipped into clean jeans (why, I don’t know) before heading out and didn’t have a tissue in the pocket.  Not having anything to wipe it on, I tried using my fingers (double yuck) and then rubbed the slippery stuff off into the wet grass.

Just as I finished that super fun activity I looked up to see the dog.  She was squatting in the weeds, trying to poop.  There was something stringy in it, making it hard for the poop to successfully fall from her rear end.  (Yep, it’s gross, sorry.)  She kept trying and then running forward a bit, and trying again.  I didn’t want her to finish the job on the gravel the kids were now playing in, so I grabbed her collar to hold her in one spot.

That’s when Peanut said, “Mommy, I have to go potty!” in a frantic 3 1/2 year old voice.  I let go of the dog and ran to her side, figuring she could squat in the grass.  Before I could even get her panties and pants off she let loose.  Pee was flying everywhere, all over her clothes that were around her ankles, all over me.  (Why didn’t I insist she use the potty like I wanted her to before we left the house???)

At this point she was bawling, asking me if I could wash her pants.  “Yes, I’ll wash them when we get home,” I said.  Then she wanted dry pants, which of course I didn’t have with me at the time.  I told her to put her rain coat down, which is pretty long, and we’d have to walk home that way.  That didn’t go over too well, but Mommy doesn’t have a magic wand to zap dry clothes to us, so it was all I could do.

Then I told Monkey we had to go home.  He looked at me like I was crazy; after all, we just got there and he was having a good time.  I picked him up so we could all walk a little faster and tried to walk us where the grass was a little shorter (it hasn’t been cut yet this year) so it wouldn’t keep hitting Peanut’s bare butt.

I’ve learned in the past to always have spare clothes for each kid; I guess I need to tote them along for walks in the backyard, too!