There are times when we all could use a laugh.   For those who need one, I’d like to share a laugh with you today.

When I picked up my daughter from school this week, her question caught me off guard.  (This is as close to what was said as I can remember — wish I had a tape recorder some times!)

As we walked to my car she asked, “What’s a witch’s stand, Mommy?”

“What?  I’m not sure I understood that right, Sweetheart.  What did you say?”

“Witch’s stand.  What is it?  We talk about it at school every day.”

“You do?”  (I started wondering what the heck they were teaching in kindergarten these days.)

“Yeah, every time we say the Pledge of Allegiance.”  

At this point I couldn’t help laughing.  I stopped right there to give her a big hug.  It was a much needed laugh.

(For my readers not familiar with the Pledge of Allegiance, it starts off  “I pledge allegiance to the flag, of the United States of America, and to the Republic for which it stands….”

Need a few more laughs?  Check out how they misunderstood one of the Veggie Tale songs.

The post For Witch’s Stand first appeared on There's Just One Mommy.

I’ve been wanting to ask my husband to do a guest post for Thankful Thursday for a while now…  And when I read this prompt from Mama Kat’s Writer’s Workshop?  I had to jump on it!  The prompt?  Bacon.

You see, last night we saw a commercial for mayonnaise.  The commercial claimed that mayo made a B.L.T. better.  My husband jumped on it, “No, it’s called a B.L.T. because bacon is the most important part of it.  In fact, if you want to make it better, you add more bacon.”

So I asked him to tell me a little more about bacon, which I’m finding is something that men rate right up there.

Here are a few of his random bacon thoughts:

I like bacon.

I don’t get it as often as I’d like.  And when I do, I have to share it.  After all, the kids like bacon, too.  But sharing is okay.

Bacon is the one thing they put on salads to trick you into eating salads when you’re really just after the bacon. 

There aren’t many things that bacon don’t go with.

I’ve decided, next time I goof up around here, I’m making him bacon for dinner:  flowers to apologize to women, bacon for men. (I’ve also decided he still owes me a Thankful Thursday post…)

So this week, thanks for bacon!

***

What food product are you thankful for?

And, if you have your own thankful post, come link up with us!

Linked up this week with Black Tag Diaries, The Fontenot Four

The post Bacon: One Man’s Thoughts first appeared on There's Just One Mommy.

They say laughter is good medicine.  And I think kids write the best prescriptions….

This week I’m thankful for the things my kids have done and said that made me laugh.

***

My daughter was hard at work at the kitchen table.  “How do you spell ‘slippery’?” she asked.

I carefully spelled it for her.

Then she asked how to spell ‘floor.’  By then she had my interest.

“What are you doing?” I asked.

Turns out she was making a sign for the floor.  She had spilled some water, and evidently to a 5 year-old it is easier to make a detailed sign to let people know the floor is wet than to wipe it up with a towel.

Got to love it.

Then there is my son.  Daddy was helping him back into his clothes for bedtime, and he said, “I need my funderwear.”

It sounded a lot like “fun to wear,” and you know, with superheroes all over them, I bet they are fun to wear.  (I see a great marketing thing here, if someone wants to jump on it, we just want a little cut for the 3 year-old’s college fund…)

***

What funny things have your kids said or done this week?  I’d love to hear about it in the comments!

And, as always, if you have your own thankful post this week, be sure to link it up with us!  I love to see the list grow!

Shared on these great blogs: Black Tag Diaries, The Fontenot Four, Six by the Bay

The post Thankful Thursday — Funny Kids first appeared on There's Just One Mommy.

In the years past I have painstakingly cut toys from their packaging and made sure they had any necessary batteries ahead of time before wrapping our children’s gifts.  Makes for a very smooth Christmas morning — no hunting for batteries or having to cut endless wires and strings to remove a toy from the box.

Yesterday, while  my husband dropped the kids off at  Mamaw and Papaw’s house for a few hours so we could wrap gifts, I headed to the basement and pulled out our son’s big Santa gift.  I cut all the tape and wires from the Batcave and started assembling pieces, planning to have it just setting under the tree unwrapped.

Having no directions in the box, I was following the pictures…  There was something missing!!

Frantic, I called the nearest Target to see if they had any others (they did) and to verify that I’d be able to exchange ours for a new one.  (My mom had actually picked it up for me and I had paid her back, so I had no receipt.)  That’s when my husband returned from dropping off the kids.  I quickly explained the situation, and we rushed to get out the door, hoping to avoid some of the evening traffic.

Friday before Christmas — yes, it was crazy busy.  I waited in the return line while my husband headed off to the toy department to hunt up a new Batcave.

Yeah!  They really still had one!  We asked to open the box, not wanting to get home and still be missing the piece.

It wasn’t in this box, either.  Hmmm…  I ran back and looked at the other Batcaves on the shelf….  It was when we were about to open a second box that we noticed the new box didn’t show the piece in question in the picture.

We decided that good old Fisher Price must have changed the toy, slightly, and hadn’t changed the pictures on the box until later.  Satisfied that we weren’t missing anything, I headed out to the car, with our original Batcave, and then I noticed my husband wasn’t behind me.

He answered his cell phone in a slightly panicked voice — his wallet was missing.

We searched the car seats, in case it had fallen out there.  Then we both raced back into Target.  Since he had been stooped while hunting through Batcaves, we figured it might have fallen out in the toy aisle.

No such luck.  (Of course, what are the chances it would still be there after all that time on a busy Friday night??)

Then we returned to the Customer Service desk and checked all over.

Nada.

“Are you sure you had it?” I asked.

After all we had been in a rush to get to the store, and it’s not like he needed it to drive the kids next door to the in-laws’ before that.

He suggested I drive home and search while he continued searching inside Target.  It’s a 30 minute drive.  My heart was racing, my stomach in knots…  Somehow I thought clearly enough to suggest we have his dad run next door to check for us.

We waited, anxiously, for his dad to call us back.

Finally, the cell phone rang.  “It’s here.”

At that point our nerves were shot, with the race to the store, the long lines, the panic over his “lost” possession…

Home is all we wanted to be.

And that’s when I decided that Santa’s elves needed a tall Rum and Coke.

***

I am taking the next few days off to just spend time with my precious family.

The Lord has blessed me with a patient husband who was willing to rush me to Target to exchange a gift that wound up not needing to be exchanged, and who later said he’d do it all over again because he knew I just wanted things to be perfect for our children this Christmas.

Sometimes in the rush of preparing for Christmas we forget just what the season truly is about, and I want to take these next few days to focus on the blessings the Lord has given us.   I want to bake more cookies, read the Christmas story to the children, and hold them close.

May you each have the chance to be with loved ones this season.

And for those of you celebrating Christmas, Merry Christmas!

The post Why Elves Drink first appeared on There's Just One Mommy.

Need a Friday laugh?  Here are a few of my favorite funny things they’ve said lately…

My 5 year-old, holding up a toy of hers that keeps coming apart:   “I wish we still had the constructions for this…”  When I looked at her kind of funny, she added, “You know, the constructions that tell you how to put it together….”

***

At lunch yesterday we were eating some left over chicken.  The 5 year-old asked if it was really chicken…  I went through the fact that chicken comes from chickens and turkey, like we had at Thanksgiving, really was a turkey.

Then I asked my 3 year-old, “And if we have beef?”     His answer?  “A beaver!”

***

And finally, as we were watching a video, the 5 year-old said, “Mommy, did you know ear wax tastes nasty?”

Yes, that’s 5 year-old wisdom at it’s finest.

What funny things have your kids said lately?

The post Funny Things They’ve Said Lately first appeared on There's Just One Mommy.

My husband had just gotten home.  “Quick, hide me and don’t tell them where I am!”  I half joked to my husband as I collapsed onto our bed beside him.

He tossed my favorite dark brown feather blanket on top of me, and then he said, “Now you look like a big pile of poop.”

Poop!  My husband just told me I looked like a pile of poop!

Quite a few remarks popped into my head at that, but none of them came out.   I was laughing way too hard to talk, which I’m pretty sure made my husband feel better, because he kind of got real quiet after what he said, like he thought he might have just stepped in it.

“Hey, at least they won’t want to bother you that way,” he said as we continued to laugh.

Sometimes my husband can say the sweetest things.  This time he said I looked like a pile of poop, and you know what?  It inspired just what I really needed at the moment, a good laugh.

The post In the Sweet Words of My Husband… first appeared on There's Just One Mommy.